For those of you who don't know, Amanda Todd was an American teenager who recently committed suicide due to bullying. Her death has caused uproar, both in the media and on social networking sites.
A bit of background- when Amanda was younger, she was involved in a video chat during which she was encouraged to flash her chest. This was screenprinted, and later used for blackmail by someone who threatened to show them to all of Amanda's friends unless she gave the blackmailer a 'show'.
Eventually, it came to light that the pictures were over the internet, and Amanda was teased because of them; this caused Amanda to experience anxiety, depression and panic disorder. Her family moved, but she started to take drugs and alcohol. Her anxiety also meant that she couldn't leave the house.
A year later, the pictures resurfaced as the original blackmailer's profile picture. Amanda was teased again, and had to change schools once more.She was happier, and started to form a relationship with a boy she had known previously. She went to the boy's house, and they had sex, despite him having a girlfriend. The next week, the girlfriend, aided by others, attacked Amanda both verbally and physically. As a result of this she tried to commit suicide by drinking bleach but was rushed to hospital.
After this, Amanda was still receiving abusive messages. Her family moved again, but the messages didn't stop. She was put on anti-depressants and had counseling, but still self-harmed and tried to overdose.
In September this year, Amanda posted a video of herself to Youtube, explaining her story using flash cards. The video received considerable views- however, though she had sympathy, a lot of people accused her of attention seeking etc.
Finally, on October 10th, Amanda committed suicide.
So far, there have been many news articles about the tragedy, people asking for more to be done about bullying and a Facebook page has been set up in her name. However, there are still many issues that, in my opinion, need to be addressed.
Firstly, the people who say that Amanda was to blame. I completely disagree. She made a mistake, and was persecuted because of this. The word here is 'mistake'. Has no one else in the world ever made a mistake? I highly doubt it. So why was she attacked so strongly? I'm sure that each and every one of the people who bullied her have things they do their best to hide, things they're not proud of. Yes, she shouldn't have flashed, and I'm sure she wished a million times to rewind time. That's the point of a mistake; you learn from it. Amanda didn't deserve the bullying she received. No one, regardless of race, gender, appearance, background et cetera, ever ever deserves to be bullied, and they're not to blame.
Secondly, views that Amanda was a drama queen or attention seeking. Again, I disagree. If anyone ever felt they had a choice to self-harm or attempt/commit suicide, it wouldn't happen. Both suicide and self-harm are a result of having no other options. Furthermore, who are we to decide how serious her problems were? She suffered from mental illnesses- she was ill. She couldn't help how she felt. You think she chose to feel as bad as she did? Finally on this note, neither self-harm or suicide are generally a means of attention seeking. Attention seeking is when you want attention. I think people often under-estimate the pain you need to feel to be driven to self-harm or suicide; if you're in the sort of place that feeling like that entails, you need attention- you need someone to help you.
My third point is less to do with Amanda, and more aimed at the reaction. Yes, it's a tragedy, and my thoughts are currently very much with her and her family. However, many people commit suicide every day. Why is all the publicity aimed at one person? There have been so many comments about stopping suicide- particularly teen suicide- and groups set up to 'stop bullying'. What are they going to do? Well, pretty much nothing.
We need, as a group, to stand up and actually do something to fight suicide and bullying. We need to reach out to the people we know, and try to make a difference. Only when we stop preaching and start doing will things change.
You know the boy who looks so tired all the time? The girl who always smiles but who you've seen crying on the way home? That boy who no one likes? The person who is always there for everyone? Do something. Be there for those people, and everyone else, like them or different. Look around and see what you can do to help others. Okay, the chances are that suicide/self-harm are the last things on their minds, but that doesn't matter. What matters is that you cared. That you listened.
Once again, I'm reverting to one of my favourite quotes- all evil needs to triumph is for good men to do nothing. Don't be that person who does nothing.